The Color of Being True to Yourself

This above all: to thine own self be true,

And it must follow, as the night the day,

Thou canst not then be false to any man.

(W. Shakespeare, "Hamlet, Act 1, Scene 3)

I will risk a certain vulnerability with you in the following story: From my father I was mentored in relating to creatures with gentleness and patience. Form frogs to cattle, dogs to birds, my dad had a gift for honoring the life of animals. He taught me that our animal companions, domestic or wild, are to be loved deeply, respected for their unique place in our lives, and on this earth. 

It is with sorrow then that I recount a scene that unfolded many years ago, at a more emotionally impoverished time of my life. Anna and I were the fortunate recipients of a canine companion whom we named "Duchess." She was the epitome of gentleness, with a large dose of puppy curiosity. 

One evening when Anna was out, Duchess and I had an altercation. I had left some plates with chicken bones on the kitchen counter. From another room I heard the cutlery rattle in the kitchen. Duchess was standing with her paws on the counter pre-cleaning the plates. I verbally reprimanded her and returned to the living room. Moments later I heard the rattle again. 

I stormed into the kitchen seeing red, and in a moment of anger I drew my foot back to kick Duchess. Had I connected it would have broken her ribs. She, however, read my body language, and in a universe-laughing-at-me moment timed her crouch perfectly. My kick passed harmlessly (for her) over her back and connected firmly with the underside of the counter, shattering my second toe. Karma I suppose.

My actions went against everything I had been taught, and indeed held to be desirable, regarding the treatment of animals. In short, I violated a core value, and in so doing caused injury in countless ways. 

“The moon does not fight. It attacks no one.

It does not worry. It does not try to crush others.

It keeps to its course,

but by its very nature, it gently influences.

What other body could pull an entire ocean from shore to shore?

The moon is faithful to its nature

and its power is never diminished.” 

(Ming-Dao Deng, Everyday Tao: Living with Balance and Harmony)

I look back on that scene with compassion and understanding, for both Duchess and myself. It was not my best moment, however, it does serve to remind me that there is a great cost to be paid in not being true to myself. At the core, at the quintessential and elemental levels, I am an expression of Love. So are you! It is to this axiom that human growth beacons our adherence - be true to yourself, for you are Love.

“A lot of the conflict you have in your life

exists simply because you're not living in alignment;

you're not be being true to yourself.” 

(Steve Maraboli, Unapologetically You)

There are a number of decisions that will face you in the coming week - at work, in your relationships, in charting the course of your life. This may guide you: know your core values, build those values on the Love that you are, and act in concordance with those values. Then, and only then, will you experience the freedom of integrity and calm with your inner being.

 As you be true to yourself you are empowered to change our world, to be a miracle-worker, sowing seeds of laughter, healing, joy, and wonder. The cost for such change is never too high, for it is paid for in the simple act of being what you have always and truly been - you!

Be true to yourself, today and all days. I leave the last word to author, Jennifer DeLucy:

“If nothing else in this long and short life,

let me be true to my conscience,

to the dignity of my own heart.

Let me act in a way that says,

I have honored my spirit

as truly as I have honored others'.

Let me stand tall and rooted as a mountain

in the face of a quaking world.” 

(Jennifer DeLucy)

The color of being true to yourself...

integrity in motion.

The sun shines

not for plants

or

sun tans

or

sparkling waves

but because

it is

its

nature

Be true

Shine

Breathe

Pray

To Ponder Further:

- From the Bible: "Better is a poor man who walks in his integrity than a rich man who is crooked in his ways." (Proverbs 28.6)

- From Sikhism: "Falsehood shall be destroyed; truth in the end shall prevail." (Adi Granth, Ramkali Ki Var, M.1, p. 953)

- From Buddhism: "Every being has the Buddha Nature. This is the self." (Mahaparinirvana Sutra 214)

The Color of Love…

“Darkness cannot drive out darkness: only light can do that.

Hate cannot drive out hate: only love can do that.” 

(Martin Luther King Jr., A Testament of Hope: The Essential Writings and Speeches)

A while back I came across this quotation: "Everyone needs to be loved especially when they don't deserve it." At first glance it seems a graceful offering of wisdom, however, listen a bit more carefully to the oxymoron embedded in the text. It is this - the words "love" and "deserve" do not sit well together.

This reminds me of a story that I came across years ago about an impoverished family living in the Bronx, New York. A single-parent family, the mother worked long hours to provide food and shelter for her children. Though times were tough they managed to stay together, stay in school and, mostly, to stay out of trouble. The youngest though, was more deeply broken by their circumstances than his siblings, and tended to express his pain through rebellion and lashing out. Now, mother had skimped and saved a few dollars here and there over the years and had a small nest-egg put away in a tin to help send one of the children to college. The youngest found the stash, stole it and spent it on a gun and drugs. He was arrested...

An older sister raged to their mother, "I hate him. I hate him for what he did, for what he has taken from us - your hard work, our dreams. I just hate him." With tears in her eyes, this life-worn, thread-bare mom responded to her daughter, "Don't hate him baby. it is when we are most difficult to love that we need to be loved the most. When we are completely lost we need love to come find us. Don't hate him, love him back to us."

“Love - not dim and blind

but so far-seeing that it can glimpse around corners,

around bends and twists and illusion;

instead of overlooking faults,

love sees through them to the secret inside.” 

(Vera Nazarian, Salt of the Air)

I've heard it often enough in our society - he/she deserves what they get. I've seen it in the Alberta redneck culture; if someone is an arsehole they deserve to be treated like an arsehole. There seems to be a certain karmic logic to this; Jesus said, we reap what we sow. Problem is, Love is all about healing and renewal, life and laughter. The person that we write-off as useless is a gifted human being that has not realized their own worth. Living the Love that we are means, in part, that we search for and draw out the Love that is within others, without regard to any sense of worthiness.

“A friend is someone who knows all about you

and still loves you.” 

(Elbert Hubbard)

Love does not discriminate between the deserving, or the undeserving. Love - the immense, indescribable power that called the universe into existence, that holds the planets in their orbits, that causes sunshine to sparkle on ocean waves like the glimmer of a million diamonds - this Love heals hearts, erupts as laughter in children, delights in the soaring eagle, the playful dolphins, the joy of first-time parents. This immense Love surrounds and fills all that is, all the time. This awesome power that is Love seeks out and soaks into the most vile offender with the same passion and yearning as it does the most enlightened saint.

“Being deeply loved by someone gives you strength,

while loving someone deeply gives you courage.” 

(Lao Tzu)

There is a temptation to commodify love, to offer it to the most deserving, those easiest to love. What we would be giving then would not be pure Love, but rather a shallow and poor forgery that seeps from the wounded ego. This love impostor is powerless to make a healing change in our world, is impotent as a life-giving agent, and can in no way draw our hearts into deeper life. But Love, pure, flowing through us, this Love - this makes a difference. 

Wherever you work today, wherever your path takes you, try this out: instead of giving what is "deserved," offer from your heart what is needed. In so doing you will be an agent of healing, a part of the renewal of our world. 

I leave the last word to Paul:

"Love is patient, love is kind.

It does not envy, it does not boast,

it is not proud.

It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking,

it is not easily angered,

it keeps no record of wrongs.

Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth.

It always protects, always trusts,

always hopes,

always perseveres."

(1 Corinthians 13)

The color of Love...

seeking the lost.

Love

erodes us

until

we 

are only

itself

Be

the Love

that

You are

Breathe

Pray

Laugh

To Ponder Further:

- From the Bible: "God is love." (1 John 4.8)

- From Hinduism: "To love is to know Me, My innermost nature, The truth that I am." (Bhagavad Gita 18.55)

- From Unification Church: "What is God? God is an existence that absolutely lives for others." (Sun Myung Moon, 4-16-88)