Self-Control and the Power of Choice

"A person without self-control is like a city broken into and left without walls."

(Proverbs 25.28)

I'm going to cut down on how much sugar I consume. Or coffee. Or TV. Or... (you fill in the blank). I'm going to pray and meditate every morning. I'm going to go to the gym four days a week. I'm going to save more, tithe more, invest more. I'm going to be more patient. I am going to spend more quality time with my spouse, kids, elder parents... How many times in life do we make these little resolutions, these promises to self, with full intention of seeing them through - until the alarm clock goes off at 5am and it's dark and cold out and the gym seems much less important than keeping the bed warm. 

Being self-disciplined is challenging, it takes - well, it takes discipline. That's the kicker for me. I wouldn't mind self-discipline so much if it were just a bit easier. Problem is my mind keeps playing tricks on me. Take sugar for instance. With a family history of diabetes and a personal history of hypoglycemia you'd think I have good reason to cut back on North America's favorite addiction. So I say to myself - "okay. Today I'm not eating sweets. None; all day." And I'm good til I go on a pastoral visit and I'm offered a piece of oven-warm flapper pie and my mind says, "It's alright 'cause it's in the line of duty. You have to eat this pie." And of course, I end up in complete agreement with myself and I smile from ear to ear as that pie goes down so nice. 

Self-discipline. Within me is a rebellious two-year-old who does not want to be told "no," who will have his own way, who will throw an internal tantrum if his will is rebutted. It takes all of my awareness to realize that the often-subtle voice of this two year old does not have my best interests at heart. I experience life most richly when I exercise a liberal measure of self-discipline - not rigidly, but liberally sprinkled throughout the various pages of my personal story. When I make choices to eat well, to exercise my body, mind and soul, when I reach for the life-giving elements and away from toxic elements of life - then a tremendous strength pours through me.

The crux of the matter is choice. In his book, The Path of Least Resistance, Author Robert Fritz suggests that our days are guided by the primary, secondary and tertiary choices that we make. Primary would be like, "I choose to be healthy." Secondary would be, "I choose to exercise to be healthy." Tertiary would be choosing to go for a walk this evening. Each moment along the way will bring us to a "Y" in the path, where one road takes us to the fulfillment of our primary choices while the other sabotages our intentions. 

"For the moment all discipline seems painful rather than pleasant,

but later it yields the peaceful fruit of righteousness to those who have been trained by it."

(Hebrews 12.11)

The apostle Paul was big on self-discipline. He recognized that walking the path of Love required Spirit-empowered choice and constant vigilance through self-discipline. Like me (and perhaps you) Paul knew that the rebellious two year old was a strong internal voice. He stated in the letter to the Romans, "I do not understand what I do. For what I want to do I do not do, but what I hate I do." (Rom. 7.15). There's me - knowing who I can be, but falling short of the mark. But Paul does not give up on himself, or on us. He goes on in chapter 12 to say:

“Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed 

by the renewing of your mind.

Then you will be able to test and approve what God's will is:

His good, pleasing and perfect will.”

(Romans 12.2)

In other words, through the power of disciplined choice we can keep that unruly two year old in line, and consequently make choices that allow our brilliance to shine through in world-healing ways. To be true to ourselves is a choice, and it takes tremendous will to realize that choice. It is a lie of the darkness, however, that tells us that we are trapped by our past, unable to grow, unable to choose Love. The work of God's Spirit is the cultivation of life-giving virtue within us: "But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control..." (Gal 5). We are not alone in this work for Christ stands with us to give us strength and encouragement. And in that light we have choices to make.

So choose Love; choose life. Each moment, as that two year old seduces you with toxic options, turn the other way and be well, and amazing, and beautiful and all that you can be.  This world needs you, because only you can do what you were born to do. Choose well...

I leave the last word to the Greek philosopher, Plato:

"The first and best victory is to conquer self."

Choosing Love with you,

Pastor Bill

the road not taken

wide and easily trod

is waiting

calling

whispering

and powerless

for your

heart

is

of God

Choose

this day

to

Love

Breathe

Pray

[First published April 24, 2013]